


How I became the Sea

by Chestnut_Tears



Series: Ocean eyes [1]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst, Drowning, Gen, Lance (Voltron)-centric, M/M, Pining Keith (Voltron), Pining Lance (Voltron), Post-Season/Series 02, Songfic, also, but it could be interpreted as that, coz i might leave it with this ending, i guess, i might write a happy ending, idk if you would consider the klance subtle or not, its not supposed to be subtle, kinda heavy angst, lance is pretty sad and homesick, so if you dont like drowning and stuff do not read this!!!!!!!!, this doesnt actually happen, this is pretty sad, until then the death tag has to stay sorry, yep set after season 2
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-23
Updated: 2017-01-23
Packaged: 2018-09-19 13:09:06
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 867
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9442010
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chestnut_Tears/pseuds/Chestnut_Tears
Summary: As the blue paladin, guardian of water, Lance could kind of use his water affinity to connect with quintessence. And on a planet covered in ocean that meant he could connect with the whole thing.So logically he could, perhaps, maybe, possibly heal a quintessence-less ocean planet.It was worth a shot. Every experiment with quintessence helped research.(Edit: now has a happy ending sequel fic set in an alternate reality/dimension thing!! ...tho in this one Lance does die)





	

**Author's Note:**

> This is named after the song by owl city which is kinda heavily used in the fic so you might want to listen to that if you dont already know it (it good)  
> Also this is my first fic (that i've actually kinda finished) and its pretty self-indulgent. Clearly i like to suffer (dont we all) Sorry if there are any mistakes! Dont hesitate to drop a polite comment pointing them out for me so i can correct them :) Thank ye that is all  
> Pls enjoy

Shiro was gone.

Shiro was still gone.

It was a hole they were building around. As they were strengthening bonds with allies, forming new treaties, and constructing new plans to fight a new enemy. Nobody attempted to fill the empty seat at the table or fill the silence when there used to be a voice. Nobody tried because Shiro was going to come back. That’s what Keith said.

Lance believed him. Lance thought he could believe anything if Keith said it.

Since Shiro’s temporary disappearance Keith had become the black paladin and he was doing pretty good. It wasn’t like he was trying to be like Shiro, he was just standing in. If anything the team was closer than ever before.

But Lance still felt disconnected. It was like an itch he couldn’t scratch, a lost feeling that sloshed around in his stomach.

He used to distract himself by throwing himself into research. Allura’s quintessence research. Her fight with Haggar and Slav’s ramblings about quintessence involved in Shiro vanishing had started her obsession with it.

He had stopped doing that though. He never felt like he helped much which that didn’t really improve all his insecurities.

Yet he’d picked up some useful things. As the blue paladin, guardian of water, Lance could kind of use his water affinity to connect with quintessence. And on a planet covered in ocean that meant he could connect with the whole thing.

So logically he could, perhaps, maybe, possibly heal a quintessence-less ocean planet.

It was worth a shot. Every experiment with quintessence helped research.

Losing another paladin wouldn’t be ideal, it’d be an annoyance for the team if they had to replace him. But Lance had known since the idea first formed that he was going to do it. He longed to see some kind of ocean again. The beach had always been home.

####

_A haven that hid me well beneath the sand_

_The wide windy waves washed in_

_But I stayed dry_

_The great breakers broke again_

_As I nodded off inside_

####

Keith was staring at him again, just a soft tired stare from across the table. He probably didn’t even realise he was staring. He hadn’t been getting enough sleep again, Lance could tell from the circles that yawned beneath his dark eyes.

God, Lance could get lost in Keith’s eyes. Tangled up in every glint of emotion that rose to their surface.

Lance never did though. One glance and alarm bells rang in his ears, anxious shivers up his spine prickling at any hints of closeness.

Untouchable. Keith was untouchable.

After all, fire and water don’t mix.

####

_I wrenched the engines off_

_And drank them down_

_The depths turned the iron soft_

_As they swiftly drowned_

_And I brought the ocean side_

_To its rusty knees_

_As I felt the even tide_

_Deep in my shallow dreams_

####

This was his last visit, he was sure, he could feel that this was going to be finished tonight. Everything he’d seen and felt during his little experiment he’d written down but this time he’d left his notes back in his room.

Even now, flying in Blue, he could feel the alien ocean splashing around him, every rusty shipwreck lying in forgotten valleys, each empty city built into the warrens of caves. The empty shell of the planet described centuries of history to Lance, it filled his dreams. He could almost forget about earth.

Hunk had asked him if he was drunk once or twice, laughing. Lance almost wished Hunk didn’t make it so easy for him to laugh off his concerns and questioning eyes.

Stumbling out of Blue, he splashed into the knee-deep water and waded, unfaltering, deeper. Resting his hands on the surface of the shimmering water he closed his eyes, breathing deeply.

The response was immediate, the ocean roared in welcome around him.

Just like the many times before, he imagined pushing light down his arms. It spiralled out, spreading around the planet with him and blue at the heart.

_And then_

Somewhere far away Blue roared and there was the vague impression of familiar voices. Friends, princess, castle, fire.

_When the Empress ran aground_

Gasping, his eyes flew open as sparks lit the air around him. He could see the quintessence. It spiralled from him towards a faint glow deep in the ocean depths.

_And my eyes turned blue and green_

Roaring in his ears. Waves and Spaceships. Lights and voices. Sea.

_I heard a gorgeous sound_

_And that's when it became a dream_

A castle landed behind him, different to the empty cities below.

_When the sky fell in_

Fire appeared behind him, gripping shoulders with burning hands. Cradled in fiery embrace, he choked on water in his lungs though he gasped at air.

_When the hurricanes came for me_

Dark eyes dripped diamonds onto his cheeks. As he got lost in them, his vision drifted away, tangled up in every glint of emotion that rose from their depths to their surface.

_I could finally crash again_

Flames danced along his jaw to his lips, lighting his brain ablaze. Yet the ocean cold clung to his legs, calling.

_And that's how I became the sea_

**Author's Note:**

> woo that was wild i can actually feel my heart breaking  
> Thank you for reading!!! please leave kudos or a comment or both (ehehe) it will be greatly appreciated!
> 
> Just in case your feeling a bit confused (idk how ambiguous my writing is sorry) how i pictured the ending is lance gives out too much to this planet he's trying to save and the blue lion alerts the castle. But as they arrive Lance is already fading, keith reaches him first, Lance collapses in his arms and keith kisses him as he 'dies' (maybe i'll add some more so lance doesnt rly die or smthg but idk, if you want me to i'm rly easy to persuade btw)  
> Lance doesn't drown because there's actually no water in his lungs at all, he doesnt go under, thats just like the ocean taking over him or smthg  
> Its all open to interpretation tho so if you saw it differently i'd love to hear it!!!
> 
> Edit: well now i've written a happy ending... which happens in a different reality not this one (im sorry lance poor bby) so just continue to the next fic in this series to read it!


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